Where There's Smoke

October 13, 2020 - Page 19


Funguy begins enchanting more chorus fruit for Wingus.


<Wingus> we're makin drugs


<Wingus> pretty cool right

<Tooligan> DAMN...

<Wingus> one hundred precinct real spaceweed right there

<Funguy> i don't think you should be smoking that....

<Wingus> funguy i just want you to know that everything that happens from here on is your fault

<Funguy> we need to get our priorities straight!!!! aren't you hungry?

<Wingus> spacew33d boosts our morale and in turn cancels out our hunger

<Funguy> that's not how it works!!!!

<Wingus> oh i forgot your the smart one. go eat your foreskin hungry boy

<June> Oh my god, Wingus, you're hurt!!!

<Wingus> not really

<June> No, you're bleeding, Wingus!

<Wingus> thats funguys fault

<June> Is that a joint?

<Wingus> thats also funguys fault

<Wingus> also he disappeared again because hes a little bitch

<June> We'll find him, let me heal you...

<Wingus> we were... smokin straight foreskin... haha

<June> I'm worried about him...


<June> I hope... fuck.

<June> Can you go find Funguy while I keep an eye on Wingus?

<Tooligan> OK ALRIGHT

<P-Man> √€¶¢÷¥∆...

<Wingus> did you just fucking deadname me

<P-Man> Well, that's how you read in our records.

<Wingus> yeah well my names Gustavus Orteil so put that on ur wiki funny man

<P-Man> I am not who you think I am...

<Wingus> woah look how emo u are. ur so emo

<P-Man> You are mistaken, Mr. Orteil.

<Wingus> yeah well you're PISSTAKEN. haha! get fucked. pee man

<P-Man> Impressive. You have already gauged my identity.

<P-Man> Anyway... I have summoned you to discuss-

<Wingus> don't care

<P-Man> It is in your best interest that you know about your-

<Wingus> don't care

<P-Man> Irony will only get you so far, Gustavus.

<Wingus> look at me bro. irony is what got me here

<P-Man> You are correct. Stranded, starving... have you not entertained the thought of your sister's fate?

<Wingus> oh so thats what this is about

<Wingus> where is she

<P-Man> I'm afraid I'm not allowed to say.

<Wingus> ohh no your not alloewd? huh? you the submissive type?

<P-Man> My employers-

<Wingus> your pimp? your pimp wont tell you let you tell ol wingus where sallywag is?

<P-Man> Enough.

<Wingus> that was funny

<Jason> wec

<Wingus> your a good friend jay you know that

<Jason> wec

<Wingus> you say it how it is, pal

<Wingus> everyone is so vague. like this whole plain crash? the catpeople? i don't get the joke!

<Jason> wec

<Wingus> sigh

<Wingus> yeah im pretty sure sal isnt even on this continent

<Tooligan> YO FUNGUY


<Funguy> yes.

<Tooligan> THAT SUCKS.


<Funguy> can you... talk a little quieter, if you can?

<Tooligan> Sorry. I gotta be loud.

<Funguy> it's intimidating.

<Tooligan> Intimidation is kinda my thing in battle.

<Funguy> battle... so you like fighting?

<Tooligan> I don't like fighting. But I gotta fight for what's right.

<Funguy> so seeing blood and stuff, you're fine with that?

<Tooligan> I've seen so much fuckin blood I'm desensitized to it.

<Tooligan> Most of the blood I've seen is of my people. With all the shit that happens in the city I want nothing more than to drink the blood of my enemies.

<Tooligan> Ok not literally drink blood you know what I mean. The Papermakers should bleed.

<Funguy> i see.

<Funguy> what do you think of wingus?

<Tooligan> He as immature as he is skilled. He's real good with kitchen knives, that's for sure.

<Funguy> i thought he was all talk.

<Tooligan> You weren't there during the fight. The fucker killed four grunts at once. I never seen anything like it! Usually the cats are the rogues, but shit, overalls is swift.

<Funguy> i think he's an annoying asshole.

<Tooligan> He is annoying. But our oppressors are more annoying. The Papermakers are beyond "annoying". If Wingus can help us overthrow those assholes, I don't care if he's always joking about foreskin and shit.

<Funguy> hm...

<Tooligan> Anyway I'm headin back to the cabin. You need anything, lemme know, ok?

<Funguy> yeah.